WAIT A MINUTE, MR. POSTMAN

I don’t know about you, but since this whole Covid-19 lockdown has been in place, I’ve been spending a lot of money shopping on amazon.com. From acrylic nail kits, hair, leggings, and hoodies, I’ve been buying up a storm. It’s been over a month, and sitting in this house has driven me mad, with a massive case of buyer’s virus. If you’re in the same boat as me, you may have been doing the same. You may have also noticed that the delivery people no longer make contact. Since social distancing started, the delivery people simply knock on the door, drop the package, and keep it moving. I had grown used to this; then, I got a package that required a signature.   

On this particular day, the rest of my household was out. I had ordered a MacBook Air, and I didn’t want to risk missing the delivery, so I decided to stay home. I did a few video workouts and hopped in the shower. Right when I finished, I heard the doorbell ring. I threw on a towel, put on a pair of flip-flops, and ran down the stairs. As I ran into the kitchen to get a knife (something I always did), I yelled at the delivery man, “One Minute.”   

When I opened the door, my breath was stolen. He was tall, had gorgeous blue eyes, brown hair, and a very fair complexion. If it wasn’t for the mask covering his face, I would’ve thought he was Tommy from Power. Lost in the moment, I drank him in, and I could tell he was doing the same to me. He looked at my moist afro, to my still damp shoulders. I felt him visualizing my figure underneath my towel, and when his eyes locked in on my feet, he licked his lips. I felt my body getting hot as he analyzed every visual inch of my body. When his vision reconnected with mine, with a nervous yet sexy voice said, “I’ve got a package for you.” I took a deep breath, I felt my body grow hot, and my nipples began to perk up. With my arousal building, I replied, “I’m sure you do.” I reached for the package, and when his gloved hand grazed mine, it was like a fire was lit. With our eyes locked, he pushed open the door and entered my house.   

He pulled down his mask and began kissing and biting my neck. As he nibbled my ear, he pressed his body up against mine. I felt his muscles underneath his shirt, and I could feel his rock-hard chest pressed up against my breasts through my towel. My pussy was throbbing as I felt his dick grow hard through his uniform. When he sat me on the stairs, my towel fell open. He bent down and took my left foot into his mouth. He licked and sucked at every toe and left a trail of kisses up to my thigh. When he got to my pussy, he licked his lips then began to explore my opening. He ran his hands along the inside of my legs as he sucked my clit into orgasm. With the wood edge of the stairs pressing into my back, my body jerked with pleasure. Aroused, I pulled his lips to mine to savor the flavor of my pussy. I opened his belt and pants to free his hard dick, and god was it beautiful. He was long, with a perfect girth and full of veins. I could tell that he’d been without sex since the lockdown, and I was more than happy to drain him dry.  

I ran to my room to grab a condom, and when I came back down the stairs, he was more than ready for me. He turned me away from him and began licking and nibbling my bootyhole. He delivered my ass cheek a vicious slap, then slid deep into me. Every thrust into my pussy pushed me hard against the wood stairs. The pain was undeniable, but the pleasure of him being deep inside of me felt so good I didn’t want it to end. He wanted to get a better angle, so he pulled me up and walked me to the kitchen. When he sat down on a dining chair, his dick stood up at attention; and with pure carnal lust controlling me, I slid my wet pussy down the length of his shaft. I rode him until my pussy was sore, and as I felt my muscles vice-grip around his dick, I let out an orgasmic roar.   

After I regained my composure, I could still feel his dick hard inside me. As I raised off his lap, I wanted him to finish me in the worst way possible. I bent over the kitchen table, giving him easy access to take full control of my body. I heard him whisper, “fucking perfect,” then he entered me. By this time, all his finesse had left, and all the remained was pure animal. He pounded me over and over, delivering slap after slap to my ass. He pulled my hair back with one hand, while he choked me with the other. Then, right before he was about to cum, he let go of my neck, sucked at his thumb and stuck it in my booty-hole. If he had kept it there a bit longer, I would’ve had another orgasm. But right as I felt it growing, I heard him yell out, “FUUUUUCK!” then he collapsed onto my back.  

After a moment, he pulled out of me with a condom full of milky cum. He went up to the bathroom to freshen up, and when he came back down, we locked eyes; then I noticed his wedding ring. He must’ve seen me looking, but when he went to speak, I stopped him.  

“–Shh! Don’t ruin the moment. If we never see each other again, what does it really matter?” He had just fucked my brains out, delivered me two orgasms, and helped me live out a long-time fantasy. I offered him a bottle of water, which he accepted, then he went on about his day.   

I know a lot of you are probably thinking, “She ain’t shit!” But we were both lost in the moment, and talking about it (after the fact) wouldn’t change a thing. 

CLEAN UP ON FLOOR 34

Unlike the previous parties we had attended, this one was extremely slow to start. My guy and I greeted the people we knew, scoped out the room, and decided to stake our claim on the chaise by the large open window. We kissed and flirted while we waited for more guests to arrive. About 30 minutes later, a guy I played with at the last party, walked in with his play-partner. He had made his decision to come to the party solely based on our previous sexual interaction and my recommendation; so, I really hoped that the party would get better. He told me about his ex, and showed me pictures from the parties they attended when they were together.  

An hour later, it was finally time to start the introductions. We went around the room, introduced ourselves, stated our DOs and DONTs, then it was dress-down-time. I couldn’t help but notice that it was way more of a sausage party than previous parties, and that there were very few women that attended with the intention to play; neither of which made me happy. Nonetheless, I retreated to the restroom to change into my lingerie and when I returned, over half the party was still fully dressed—What the Fuck! Unlike other parties, that had a designated smoking bathroom, since the hotel was non-smoking; anyone that wanted to smoke had to go down to the street. When ¾ of the party returned, I hoped that once everyone returned the party would get better. Normally, I don’t mind being one of the first to get things started; but since everyone was still dressed it was very difficult for me to lower my inhibitions. My guy, being the horn-dog that he is, didn’t care, and I could tell that he was ready to go, but my mood was totally halted. We remained sitting on the chaise, playing with our phones, and hoping more guests would arrive. After a while, the guy that came to play with me got fed up with the lack of order, got his partner, and they left. When I spoke to him later I apologized for the bad experience he had. I told him that was a one-off bad experience, and that the next party would be way better. He asked me how the rest of the night went, and I was happy to let him know that the night wasn’t a total bust. 

After a while, one of the other guests and his wife decided to take the lead to get the party started. He made a show of eating her booty hole and that allowed a few others to start openly engaging. Another woman started sucking her man’s dick, and seeing another couple in action made me horny. I was finally ready to play; and the first thing I wanted to do was have my pussy eaten. I laid down on my back for my man to devour me. My breasts came out as my robe slipped to the side, exposing my pierced nipples for fellow party-goers to adore and rub on. My moans from my partner’s oral pleasure were heightened by hands rubbing on my feet, my legs, and my thighs; it felt intoxicating. As I reached my orgasm I let out a loud scream and clenched my thighs around his head. Once down from my high, I was ready for him to fuck me. As he got into position behind me and put on a condom, I went into my bag of treasures and pulled out my jeweled butt-plugs. By this time, the room had begun to fill up and we had a crowd of spectators that were amazed at my butt-plug. I moistened it in my mouth and had my man insert it, and braced for impact; only he had a different plan.  

I was bent over, wet, butt-plug inserted and ready for sex; except, my guy decided to try an put on a show. He wanted to show the spectators how good he was at eating pussy. The only problem was, I just had an orgasm, and I can’t have two back to back (my body isn’t set up like that). As he kept working his tongue on my clit for the audience, I grew less and less aroused. When he finally got the hint that I wasn’t going to cum, he slid the condom on and prepared to fuck, only he had grown soft. He put so much focus on pleasing the crowd, he missed the opportunity. I turned around and began sucking his dick to get him hard; once my job was accomplished, he bent me over and began to fuck me. As he fucked me from behind, another of my repeat-play-mates, positioned himself in front of me and I reveled in sucking his dick. I licked, flicked, sucked, and gagged on him as I was being fucked from the back. After my guy had his orgasm, he cleaned up and then they swapped places. I always enjoy the pressure of a dick entering my pussy and that time was no different. Once inside of me, he delivered into me deep and intentional strokes. When he had reached his orgasm, it was clear that my vagina was done and mouth were done. 

I went to the shower to freshen up and when I returned my guy was ready to go again, but I was not. He was getting hard, but I had no desire to have a penis in my mouth, or vagina; so I told him we could masturbate together. 

He sat down on the edge of the bed and I got my womanizer out and kneeled down in front of him. Once he started to stroke I powered her up. The sucking pulse of the womanizer performed wonders on my clit, and I moaned louder and louder. As I felt my orgasm reaching a peak, my moans became a vocal example of what was happening inside my body. I heard one of the guys in the room say; “Yo! Her moans are getting my dick hard.” But after that, all other sounds died away. As my screams overpowered the sounds in the suite, my orgasms continued to build. Right after my guy came on my tits, I reached the peak of my orgasm with an extreme high-note, followed by my juices exploding onto the carpet. My body shook as the rushes of orgasms kept coming and forced me to release more and more fluid; then I collapsed onto his lap. Once I regained my composure, I got up from the floor, and he joined me in the shower. Once clean, we gathered our clothes and got dressed. It was then that I realized I accidentally got his briefs wet with my juices; but, there was nothing we could do about it. After we dressed, we put on our clothes, said our good-byes, and exited the party. 

Despite the beginning, the party ended on a literal high-note. And, on the 34^th floor of One UN Plaza, with the FDR Drive and the night sky outside the window; I had my first swinger squirt. 

F*CKING UP SHEETS!

There’s a joy that one feels when you leave home and stay at a place that’s not your own. I, like many people, love a good vacation. However, with the rising costs of living, lack of time, lack of funds to go on holidays, and inadequate paid time off, many people don’t get to experience the minimums that a working life has to offer. Whenever I get to be out and do my own thing, I take it all in. I’ve become quite the connoisseur of using Airbnb for mini-trips away or for weekends when I want to be alone with my guy. Between work, writing, reading, and training, it’s refreshing to relax and be the definition of lazy. It’s also refreshing to know that the sheets you fucked up, are not your responsibility to clean.  

Last weekend, my man and I had a weekend all to ourselves. We went to a show on Friday night, followed by dancing. When we got home Saturday morning, we didn’t leave the house until Sunday when we checked out. Saturday morning, he woke me up for breakfast in bed; so, I fed him my pussy twice; then, we went back to sleep. When I finally truly, woke up around noon, I made us breakfast. We stayed inside all day and watched Sabrina on Netflix. When we got hungry again, I made us dinner, then we finished the season, and moved onto watching The Magicians. Cuddled on the couch, I had never felt so at ease. The day was the definition of amazing, and the events of that evening were the strawberry gusher on top. 

We showered together and the hot water cascading on our bodies felt intoxicating. Once in bed, we kissed passionately, then I went down to please him. I used all the tools in my arsenal: from my tongue swirl to my sucking pulse, all in an effort to deliver unto him pleasures that made him squirm and moan. When he told me that he wanted me to ride him, I put on a condom and happily obliged. I used my glutes and hamstring strength to bounce up and down; then, I eased up when he thrust his hips deeper into me. When we had our fill of that position, he laid me on my back, opened my legs wide, and pounded into me. With a few needed lube applications, to keep the party going, I moaned out with every thrust that massaged my spot. In between the cocktails of “fuck!”, “yes!” and “oh my god!” there were many “I love you!” exchanges. I wrapped my legs around his waist and thrust my lower body to meet his. When we had our fill with missionary, before we changed to doggy, he devoured me once more. With his mouth on my clit and finger in my ass, he delivered me an amazing orgasm.  

With my ass up in the air and face buried into the pillow, he proceeded to make love to me; and I devoured every second of it. The beads of his sweat dripped onto my back, and their cool delivered an exhilarating chill. He went to reposition himself and stick it in my ass. Before he entered, I got my womanizer…  

NEVER LEAVE HOME WITHOUT IT! 

For the record, I don’t enjoy anal sex alone. The nerve endings in my ass do not receive pleasure the same way my pussy does. No matter how much lube my partner uses, I can feel the penis rubbing against the skin of my ass, and it delivers to my mind a visual image that shuts down the pleasure highway. So, since I started adding anal sex into my repertoire, I always use my womanizer. The sucking motion of the toy distracts my brain, and it makes the entire experience pleasurable beyond measure. Every time I’m fucked in the ass, with my womanizer on my clit, I have an orgasm. This time would’ve been no different; however… 

Once I powered it up and placed it onto my clit, I told him he could start going slow. I felt my booty hole open up as he slid into me; in collaboration with the sucking motion of the toy, I felt my body reaching an orgasm. As he began to pick up the pace, my clit began to throb like it hadn’t before. He continued to deliver me pleasure-filled thrusts until my body lost control. I first felt the wetness start to drip down my thigh, in between his thrusts; then, just as I had reached my peak; with shaking orgasm and a loud face-in-pillow-stifled roar, my abdominals clenched and my pussy released a squirt of fluid, in amounts I had never released before. There was nothing I could do but ride my orgasmic wave and, since he couldn’t get out of the way fast enough; he had no option but to shower in my juices. Thank god for the towel I laid down prior!  

When I came back down from my high, he slid right back into my ass and proceeded to fuck me until he reached his orgasm. With both of us covered in each other’s fluids (me in his sweat, and him in my squirt), we passed collapsed onto the bed. 

After a few minutes we took a quick shower; then, thanks to some more carefully placed thick and fluffy towels, we were able to fall into a deep sleep. Up until that night, I had only ever squirted in the shower or in my bed. It was not my goal that evening to fuck up the sheets, but I was elated that it wasn’t my responsibility to clean them up.  

KEY WORD: TURN UP

When I discovered I liked women too.

Ever since I was 14 up until about 18, when it came to online dating, I would establish necessary precautions. After exchanging numbers and many pictures, we would plan to meet in a crowded area, and as a final safety precaution- I would let one of my friends know where I was going. I would text them his picture and/or address for safety. Worst case scenario, if I was taken by a serial killer- they would know where to start. Eventually, I stopped installing these precautions and just hoped for the best. But, in the summer of 2017, I for the first time (in a very long time), dug into my old bag of tricks and implemented the “TURN UP”. 

I was on the dating site Positive Singles, and this handsome stallion came across my page. He was white, had brown shaggy hair, and had broad shoulders. His face was blocked out; but, I discovered, it wasn’t uncommon for this site. As I continued to swipe the next picture was of him and his girlfriend, also blocked out. They lived together in Brooklyn and stated they were an open/poly couple and were interested in meeting a female that wanted to play (This peaked my interest). I always wondered about my bisexuality; sure, I had kissed girls before but I never went beyond that. So, after we exchanged numbers, he sent me their pictures. He was handsome, to say the least, and athletic; and she was very pretty and had the body of a dancer. After talking to them for about a week, we worked out the kinks to meet at a bar downtown to see if we wanted to take our encounter to the next level. 

On the walk there, I was so nervous as hell. I felt like I was going on an audition for a job that I way too underqualified to even dream about. I knew they knew I was black but what if, when they saw me, thought I was Too Black (what that actually means- I have no clue, but it was a thought at the time). I had a lot of recent pictures on my profile but I had some older ones too. I had pictures from a land before time; pictures where I looked super tiny to me (but, probably not smaller than an 8). I didn’t want to walk in and upon seeing me, they felt catfished, throw drinks in my face and run out of the bar. So, I put my best foot forward.  

The day was hot, somewhere in the 90s. I work fitted black mini dress, a flower print beach duster, my colorful sandals and I wore my hair in an afro. They were seated in the back when I arrived; I spotted them right away. I walked to the back, sat down, and we immediately hit it off. He bought the first round of drinks, she bought the second, and we talked for hours. They seemed to have a deep connection and it was refreshing to see a younger couple living so freely. So, I had to know why they. wanted to bring another female into the mix. The situation was this; prior to being with him, she was a hardcore lesbian. She had been with men before but not seriously. So, when fate brought them two together, she fell in love with him. But there would always be something he could not give her, (dick is simply not pussy… It just isn’t). So, every once in a while, they would seek an interesting female to come and play. I went to the bathroom; and, when I came back, they gave me the news that they wanted me to be their Guest Star. (Yesss!) We agreed to set a date in a few weeks when I got back from my trip to Jamaica, and we departed.  

During the week they asked if I could meet before my trip. I had to do some serious maneuvering to make it happen but I was eager, so I did. That night I dragged my shit from home all the way to Brooklyn to rendezvous. I told my friend; who also lives in Brooklyn and whom I was also travelling with, my plans. I told him if I did not text TURN UP after every message to call the cops… (just to be safe-of course). I got to their place, it was nice. We had a drink to loosen up and he asked to kiss me. Man! He was a great kisser, and then she came over and we kissed to. Geez! Another great kisser. She suggested he go to the store and buy condoms, since they had none. When he returns, she and I are making out and we all go upstairs to the bedroom.  

Once upstairs, clothes are removed and we move to the bed. Hands, lips, limbs, and tongues are everywhere. They both start by pleasing me; it’s moist, hot, and sweet. Once I climax, I want him in my mouth immediately after. He fills me just right and she joins me in finishing him off. He steps away for a quick shower and I take my turn and taste her… (I could get used to this!) I give her finger play and she gives me rave reviews; I never ate pussy before but I was told I did it very well. When he returns, I’m super wet with anticipation. As he enters me, my body is on all cylinders and with each push I’m brought closer to extasy; she compliments his thrusts by using her vibrator and I lose my entire mind. If a stranger was passing by, they would think I was getting murdered. I then sit on her face and he takes her missionary. Once we all meet our peak, we take a quick shower and lay in bed. She invites us to continue enjoying one another, but she is now tired. We go back downstairs and the fun continues. I ride him on the sofa and feverishly rub myself to orgasm. I take him into my mouth again – He Orgasms. He pleases me with his fingers – I Orgasm again. By the time it’s time for me to head to my friend’s house my body is in a limbo state of pained extasy. I’m glossed over, raw, thirsty, ass is spanked red, and I could still go more rounds. But I have to get ready for my flight. I go upstairs to shower again, call an uber, I kiss them both good bye and I text my friend that I am on my way. Oh… TURN UP! 

A fantastic send-off! 

Attack of the Gherkins: Part 3A (Just Give it a Try)

I didn’t want to believe that I could be so shallow. I didn’t want to believe that if the right man came along, and the only negative was his penis size, that I would kick him to the curb. I wasn’t that bad- was I?

I started talking to G_OKC in April 2017. He arranged for our first date to be at a wine & cheese bar on the west side, just beyond Times Square. I left from work and hopped on the train to meet him. When I got off the train, for some weird reason, my logistics were totally screwed up and I had no clue where I was. I started walking, using my Google maps app but after 5 minutes I realized I was going in the wrong direction. I was in heels, a tight pencil skirt (looking very sexy, I must admit) and then it started to rain, I did not want to walk anymore. I tried hailing a cab, with no luck after 5 minutes. I eventually called an Uber. It arrived 10 minutes later and I was on my way to meet him.

When I arrived the restaurant was quite crowded. He saw me before I saw him, he walked to embrace me with a hug and he asked the hostess for a table. He was very handsome; great stature, bold glasses, distinct looks and an accent that was a combination of Indian and British. As dining at a wine and cheese bar was new to me, I let him choose the wine and food. He was a computer engineer and did private catering as a hobby, so I knew I could trust his taste. I thought to myself, finally!- a man with a career and evolved culinary knowledge. (This was very important to me. I love food! Many people eat to live, while I live to eat- #HaveFoodWillTravel is my motto. He was such a breath of fresh air, especially since my last ex was a fast food, 25cent snack at the corner store food junkie. The date went well, compared to what I was used to. The only issue that day was his smoking. I hate dating smokers, but I said to myself- if everything else is good, could I live with it? The answer was yes, so I didn’t hold it against him.

On the next date he invited me over for dinner. In the comfort of his own home the uniqueness of his character was much more obvious. He had on some ethnic print harem pants; his flip-flops showed his awkward hobbit-shaped feet, with his big toes painted a bright green. In my mind, I had casted much judgments, but I remembered he was at home and as long as he didn’t walk outside with me looking like that it wasn’t so bad.

He made, quite possibly, the most delicious pork dish I ever had, with flavorful brown gravy with bright citrus notes and jasmine rice, simply delicious. His table manners, on the other hand, were totally despicable. I used my fork and knife, he was a caveman, and he used his fingers. I finished my food and gravy with a spoon, and he picked up the bowl and drank the sauce. When he was done, he placed his foot on the kitchen table and rubbed his slightly plumped belly- no table manners what so ever. I should have called it a night then but I was optimistic. (You see, this was during the first season of American Gods. If you haven’t already seen it, you must watch it. There is a scene where an Indian man, who’s actually a genie, has sex with an unsuspecting human male passenger. In the scene he drops his pants and this mammoth penis is on screen #wow. Now, I’ve heard all the rumors about Asian and Indian men having small penises but I didn’t want to believe the stereotype and I had hope that maybe I was finally finding the total package, so I decided to stay and see for myself.)

In his room, I was laying on his bed (fitted orange dress and strappy cork heels), while he smoked his cigarette and blew the smoke out of the window. We spoke with ease, but I could tell he had something on his mind. So, I asked him what he was thinking. It was the first time a man had ever asked for permission to kiss me. I told him, yes but only after he brushed his teeth. With that, he jumped up, went to the bathroom to freshen up and came back new and improved. We commenced to kiss. His lips, upon viewing them, seemed small, but once we started kissing had the characteristics of an iceberg status (small on the surface, yet large and powerful underneath) those lips made me weak in the knees. In that moment I wanted his lips everywhere. He continued to ask my permission with every advance he made: hands around my waist, down on my ass, laying me down on the bed, hiking up my dress, kissing behind my knees, in between my thighs, kissing over my thong, then removing them to kiss what lay beneath. At every advance my body wanted more and more. The power his mouth possessed on me that evening was explosive beyond measure. He brought my body to screaming pleasure three times with just his tongue and fingers. I thought to myself Thank God.

As I lay there spent on his bed he went back to smoking another cigarette and drinking his wine. We started talking about sexual gratifications and we got on the topic of penis size. He asked what my ideal was, and I was honest and said 6” being my minimum and around 8” being my maximum (I don’t want to have an involuntary hysterectomy because my man has donkey dick- some things are too big for me). When I told him my answer he was very honest about his size. There is nothing I hate more than a man that tells lies on his dick but his being honest was a chance for me to really see if size really does matter. Could I let a “little” thing be a big issue? I was willing to see.

When he finished his cigarette he brushed his teeth then came to bed. He started me back up again with his lovely mouth and fingers. He got a condom and I was able to see exactly what he had. There was so much disappointment in my rapidly beating heart at that moment. His penis may have been the size of my middle finger at full erectness. I was in utter disbelief. We started in missionary- I felt absolutely nothing. I then forced him to switch to doggy style, I felt something but it was still closer to nothing. Because he made me reach orgasm five times already I figured I could give him one… or so I thought.

Now, normally when my partner reaches orgasm I hear a few groans, they grab tighter, cum, and come down off their sexual high. That night, I had experienced brand new territory.

It started with his moaning, then his pushes became more rapid, then his body began to shake. He slammed the wall with his fist and continued to convulse. I’m bent over, facing the wall; wondering- is he having a seizure? What the fuck is going on back there? He must have read my body reacting because he then explained that he has multiple orgasms. He must have been climaxing for what seemed like 10 minutes, after he had already cum. Well that’s different, I thought to myself.

When he was finally done he pulled me close, we kissed and he wrapped his legs and arms around me. Lying next to him, ignoring all the questions and concerns looming in my brain, it felt good. His skills were great, minus his obvious shortcomings, but I hoped for a man like him for so long: good career, cultured, well traveled, foodie, can hold a conversation, accepts my weird-uniqueness, genuinely into me, and a gentleman. I could try and look beyond the “small” “insignificant” physical issue right? I tried it for a few months and it would all come to an end in part 3B.

(Attack of the Gherkins finale in Part 3B, Next Week)